nagging reminders

for a short but very meaningful time i lived in England - a few hours out of London in a city called Norwich (pronounced Norrich - or Norridge if you're a long time local).

apart from missing my family and friends and the fact that I had to drive an hour (albeit a lovely country-road hour) to see my cat (quarrantine) a couple of times a week, it was a very happy time in my life. i met some really wonderful people - some of whom I still send Christmas cards - and lived a fairly peaceful (if sometimes challenging) life. it wasn't idyllic - what life REALLY is? - but it was pleasant, fun, friendly, and it suited me very well.

lately there have been reminders of England all around me. last night while watching the Food Network Gingerbread House Challenge there was a commercial for some company offering up a Narnia sweepstakes to win a trip for 4 to London. one of the folks from another blog i stop in on now and again is spending her Christmas in London. even my company is focusing a lot of its attention on our UK operations in the coming year.

the thing is, i'm not really sure how it's making me feel.

for a long time after i came back, i was painfully "homesick".
for a few years after, i would find myself thinking of that home often and fondly, but not with the same longing.
it's been 10 years, now, and apart from the occasional reminder (and Christmas card) England has become mostly just another lovely country to put on the list of places i'd like my daughter to visit.
but lately with reminders and the sentimentality that is bred of holiday seasons, thoughts of England have been hitting me differently... with a definite hint of that long ago longing, and another hint of wonder...

i do know i'm leary of a visit for fear of finding myself once again miserable at the thought of leaving.

that's all... just my thoughts on it... incomplete as they are.