And Falling Fast

Wow.
It's amazing what a week at home can take out of you... well, me.

It's not even 3 and I'm tired to the point of wondering who would notice if I were just to put my head down for a second or two.

Back in the Saddle

Wild Ride
While I still have a lingering cough and stuffed nose (enough to inspire more than one co-worker to ask if I'm REALLY ready to be back here) I'm feeling much better... and was actually productive already today. Mom's ribs are still healing, but all in all, we're all feeling much better.
*Special thanks to those who took the time to pray for our improved health.

Idyll Ride
While I was out, I realised how very much I like being at home with my daughter, and while I'm a control freak who could NEVER be happy without my own money (earned by myself), I would really enjoy a life where working was an option.

My new goal is to get myself debt-free as soon as I can so that I can say "my husband earns a good enough living to pay our bills, and I have a handful of pin money set aside, I think I'm going to quit my job today and look for a new one in a few months."

Child Ride
My daughter is now self actualized.

When asked "Where's mama?" she will pat me on the chest. When asked "Where's Nana?" she will pat my mother on the chest. When asked "Where's FooFoo?" she pats her own chest and smiles.

File Ride
So I'm back at work... there's a lot of work here that was (apparently rather impatiently) waiting for my return. As such, I have a lot to do and should call this one to an end.

Hello... Hello???

According to the PA at my doctor's office, I've missed my calling. She says I should have studied medicine.

Why?

Because when I saw how much pain my mom was in from the fall - actually from the landing on the iceburg - but didn't see any bruising, I told her that I thought she had broken a rib and that she should get x-rays.

Yesterday mom finally made it to the doctor's office, and then to the hospital for x-rays. Apparently, when a patient is suffering pain that intense and doesn't have a bruising it generally means it's a broken rib.

In mom's case... it was two. One broken clean through, the other cracked almost all the way.

I don't think I'll be enrolling in any gross anatomy classes any time soon, but it's nice to know my instincts are good.

Bugs part 2

My mom has it... bad.

I'm getting... bad.

And I'm at work instead of at home taking care of my family.

It sucks that bad.

Bugs and Babies

My dad brought the flu home with him on Friday. I'm not at all sure where he collected it, but in two days he went from irritating to pathetic... and if it weren't for the fact that he's a 59 year old man who hasn't yet learned to COVER HIS COUGH, I'd be feeling a more guilty. For about 6 hours, I honestly believed he was faking it for attention... still, last night I made him home made chicken soup, hoping it would make him a little less miserable.

We didn't see him for more than an hour yesterday, the rest of the day he spent in bed, hopefully getting the rest that will help him recover faster. Today he's going to see his doctor, certainly to be told to keep resting and to push fluids.

My mom and I both have a nagging cough. My husband too, but he says it's his allergies.

I'm not too concerned about the four of us... we're tough and have made it through these things before. I mean, yeah, I am concerned, but not like I am for my daughter. She's almost 11 months old now... still SO small, and defenseless... and not yet acquainted with the evil of viruses.

I'm done for now... caught up in the thought of viruses and babies... makes me blue... and I have to go get some work done... just so it's done earlier than later, just in case.

Better Head

I love my mom.

Yesterday, when my daughter was taking her evening nap
(I love my daughter's evening nap too)
my mom colored my hair and revamped the cool, but not perfect haircut I was sporting.

Now my hairs are shiny and new... lovely, root-free, and "nearly-spring-time" red... and short all the way 'round.

Road Trip

There are some days when nothing is as cool as watching the road ahead melt into the road behind...

Yesterday we had a destination, but the journey rocked.

The sky "to" was blue and sunny... peppered (or salted perhaps) with random clouds.
The company was comprised of two of my most favorite people in the world.
We stopped for soda and candy bars... and snowballs for the ride home.

The sky "from" was twi-lit pink on the left side of the car, and simmering night-coming blue on the right. There were electric orange and golden glowing clouds around the setting sun.
The company was, again, husband and daughter.
We tried stopping for milk shakes, but I'm convinced that Lenawee County has a law aginst making a half and half chocolate and Shamrock shake... but I had snowball skins to console me.

230 miles and 4 hours of driving later... I'm excited about our next day on the road.

How to Infuriate Me

It goes a little like this.

Dec 31
We're returning the keys for the rental. I didn't cancel your DTE Service because I didn't want your pipes to freeze, can you please take care of that soon?

Feb 3
I just got a $250 bill from DTE for services I didn't receive, can you please take care of that soon?

Mar 3
I just got a call from DTE regarding the $250 bill you still haven't paid. What's going on?

Mar 4
Thank goodness you finally took care of that month late $250 DTE bill

Mar 14
I just got a $297 bill from DTE for services I didn't receive, can you please take care of that soon?

Funny bits:

The only reason the account was taken out of my name, finally, is because the new tennants just transferred it into theirs.

The $297 bill isn't going to be the last... there's also going to be one more, for the one day between the end of the billing cycle and the day they transferred service out of my name.

Traitors Under the Weather

For the past several days I've been telling people that I'm just feeling under the weather. Which, until today, I believed to be the truth.

Today, my left ear, my throat, and my lungs have officially turned their traitorous backs on me and left me not only under the weather, but under attack.

I am leaving the office early today. Considering it a post-emptive strike of rest and quiet against the evil (probably) virus that's attacking me.

My white blood cells and I, however, refuse to wave the white flag.

Hair Cut Up Date

All of the people on my team and about 5 people outside of it have verbally "noticed" my new hair.

Perhaps the others have noticed but don't like it - poor them.

Perhaps, however, because I wear it in a tiny little pony tail most of the time, it still resembles the ballerina bun in which I used to wear it, and they haven't noticed because I haven't given them the chance.

* * *
As a side note... if I were to cut my hair to what I consider its most practical length, I'd likely have something akin to Mary Martin's "Peter Pan" 'do.

Thank goodness I have people to remind me that not everything has to be at its most efficient.

Cocooned

My husband is a highly social creature.

He has a large circle of friends and he very much enjoys spending time with them. I encourage this... partly because I can live vicariously through his social events, and partly because he can, from time to time, manage to drag me out of the house.

I'm an exceptionally homey person.

I prefer the companionship of a blazing fire, a cup of tea, or a good book though lately that has been lovingly replaced by my daughter. I enjoy the aroma of hearty dinners and luscious desserts baking in our oven, and the soft embrace of clean linens. I think he encourages me in this... partly because he can come home, exhausted from his social events, to a good meal, a sweet treat and from time to time, I can manage to tie him down to the comforts of home.

Isn't marriage wonderful?

Evil Genius Learns Italian

I'm a generally reasonable woman. I understand that mistakes are made. I'm not even all that demanding when they are made... I simply expect what can be fixed to be taken care of.

So, for my husband's birthday, I ordered some books... actually just two books. One that he wanted and one that was my own little surprise. The gift was, even at it's onset, a little disappointing because the books didn't arrive in time for his birthday, but that was ok... I printed up the pictures of them and gave him those. He was pleased enough.

The book he wanted - Electronic Gadgets for the Evil Genuis
The book I selected - Sneaky uses for everyday things

We received the book I selected and a lovely Barnes and Noble selection of Listen and Learn Italian.

Uh, yeah.

So, whatever, I call the customer service number they provide on the invoice - 1-800 - THE-BOOK (with no numeric equivalent, I might add - I hate that) and spend the better part of a half hour trying to navigate their voicemail system and get the boy (Dave - which I do not believe is his real name... Did you know that Gateway phone staff are encouraged to create pseudonym's for their phone persona?) to send me a return label and explain clearly why he's going to bill me again for a book I've already purchased.

When it was all done - mostly to my satisfaction - I got on with my day. When I checked my e-mail, however, I discover that there's an order pending (I knew that would be there) to which a shipping fee was applied. This took me QUITE by surprise as I was informed that one of the times he put me on hold was for the express purpose of obtaining a waiver for the shipping fee.

I called back and spoke with Michelle (again, probably not her real name) who advised me that this is the way they do all their orders and that the billing that will go through to my credit card will not include the $3.99 shipping.

"And if my credit card statement does include it?" I enquired.

Appparently all I have to do is call their customer service center and they'll take care of me.

Uh, yeah.

Africa

For many years I have had something of a tick list of the things I would like to do; a few items (listed in order of sentence length):

Have a cat
Live by myself
Vacation on a Carribean Island
Visit Europe - or even just parts of it
Own a "haunted" hotel or restaurant or both
Swim with sharks, preferrably on the Great Barrier Reef
Go on a safari and stand with both feet firmly planted on Kilimanjaro

There are more, but this is a pretty good sample. Most of these (if you can't tell) are born of my childhood... I watched a lot of Jaques Cousteau and Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. I've done a lot of the items on my wish list. These are definitely blessings counted, and memories that - barring Alzheimers - will not fade or die. They are not only a part of my history, but many of them have been defining elements of who I am.

I had my daughter last year. When I got pregnant I realised, then and there, that for the most part, my rate of "completed" tick marks on my list was bound to diminish. But that's ok... being a mom - a great mom as a matter of fact - has also been a big ticket item on my list for quite a while too.

I do, however, have one minor regret... Africa. Yes, I know I could wait until my daughter is older and wants to do something on her own for a month or so... and, yes, I have considered the other option of taking her with me, when she's older... but the problem with these is that I will be older too. My imagined Africa is a young woman's Africa... full of adventure and day long hikes and all of the wilderness a wild young heart could desire.

These days, I consider redefining my Africa... making it a Miss Marple Africa... or even a shared Africa, where mother and daughter experience the same place from different points of view.

Still... my selfish heart (the heart that had me put off motherhood until my mid-30's) aches for my young woman's Africa.

My daughter will know this... not the depth of the regret, but the fact that it is there. Not because I plan on telling her, but because I know that she and I will have the kind of relationship in which she'll know my heart... because I will not lie to her, or hide my heart from her. And perhaps, if I'm lucky, she'll have an Africa of her own that she will be willing to share with me.

Shakin' it Up

I didn't follow my "ritual" this morning... which really makes me laugh for reasons I'll share farther down the page. Instead I did things all wonky... initially because I was crazy confused this morning when I awakened... then because I remembered having heard that if you mix things up it exercises your brain. My brain has been a bit dusty lately... so when it was fog free enough to have meaningful conversation with me, together we decided, "what the heck" let's do it. Afterward I seemed to be in a much better mood... even almost chipper when I woke my husband up for the day.

Reasons for lauging at "ritual"... yesterday my honey (I'll call him Guck) decided that between us we've moved enough to be Bedouin, and even issued me a tribal name "Two Peaces" (which I REALLY like by the bye). I didn't know that this morning when I had the thought of changing my ritual - as I didn't get the Bedouin e-mail until this morning when I got in.

Don't you just love Serendipity?

That's What I Get...

For trusting the way the day began.

Most of my work day was crap.

I'm tired of being the one who knows the answers. I'm tired of being the one who "makes the calls." I'm tired of not being able to get my job done because I'm enabling others to not know how to do their own work.

Rant Complete... thank you for your attention.

Shining Happy Monday

What a delightful Monday morning... in spite of how it began.

A few Steps Back
On Friday I transferred my IRS return from my savings to my checking.

I spent time Sunday in the cardboard jungle of our basement, where ALL of our belongings, save clothes and a few books, are housed. I moved, explored, and climbed over more stuff than I remember having, in search of a box of checks.

An hour later - bruised, sweaty, and the mental equivalent of that - at the back of the jungle, I opened the table that contained the checks only to have - at that moment - the epiphany that the checks with the "new" address (which is now the old address - but the only address for which I have checks - I HATE MOVING) were NOT in the table with the boxes of checks, but in the trunk of my car. I sustained further injury on the way out.

Back to the Present
So I was late getting up this morning. It was too nice being culred up with my daughter and cat... dozing (more accurately "Snoozing") my morning prep time away. Typically I'm the kind of person who can get ready and leave in 15 minutes... but not in the morning on work days.

In the morning on work days I have to conquor the labrynth of vicious wood products along the course to deposit the baby with my mom... in the dark. That done, I have to feed the cat (and yes, it has to be in this order), collect my lunch and the cat's insulin from the fridge, get the freezer pack for the bottles out of the freezer, fill a syringe with insulin, and put it back in the fridge. This done, I give the cat a few moments to eat, while I brush my hair. Usually brushing my hair inspires the cat to have his brushed, after which I give him his shot. Then the needle goes into the sharps container. Then I get to go upstairs and get dressed. On bad snowy days or REALLY cold days I go out and start my car before going upstairs. Anyone who is or knows a woman knows what a challenge it can be to get dressed for work, so I'll leave that alone. Then I wake up my husband... which is less a challenge than anyone who knows him would think. Then I go downstairs, kiss the (sleeping) baby and my mom goodbye, collect my bags (usually 3) and leave for work... usually at about 6 am.

The whole affair usually takes me about a half an hour... maybe 40 minutes if I haven't given any thought to what I would wear for the day.

This morning I woke up at 10 to 6.

But that's ok. Once I got on the e-way the traffic was light. I got to work only a few moments after 7, and all in one piece.

Then I got to work on making this a great day.

A third of my IRS refund has paid off and closed a credit account... WHAT a feeling of freedom, accomplishment, relief. I WILL work my way toward financial desirability and a shining credit report!!!

The second third was split almost in half (the greater portion going to my daughter) between savings accounts - my daughter's and mine.

The third third is waiting. I'm honestly notsure what to do with it. I could put it in savings. I could pay down another of the credit cards. I could stash it away for a long weekend away with my husband. I'm still debating. I like having the options open.

Oh - and to top off my great morning - I got to send an e-mail that details how horribly petty a pain in my neck is being about a particular set of information... to the tune of being less than 1% of an issue! Woo Hoo!

Ok - enough joy for the moment. I'm going back to work.

On Responsibility

About two months ago my family and I moved out of our rented house and into my parents' home. It was a decision that made sense on many levels, and fortunately, still does.

When I moved out - the beginning of the dead of winter here in Michigan - I called the Energy company to advise them of my upcoming move.
In all of my previous moves, the Landlord had had a Landlord/Tennant policy with the Energy company... it made it easy... I told them the date I was moving out, and on that day the bill reverted to my Landlord's policy. In this instance it was not the case. And here we were, nearing the dead of winter... and it gets cold near the dead of winter, here in Michigan.
Knowing that homes without energy at this time of year often suffer the tragedy of frozen and bursting water pipes, I told the Energy company that rather than leaving the house without energy, and facing the worry of freezing pipes, I would advise my Landlord, at the Handover of the Keys that the Energy company would need to be notified that the bill should be switched from my name, and for kindness' sake, asked them not to turn off the energy on the first of the following month.
When we handed over the keys, I informed the Landlord of the understanding with the Energy company, and was warmly thanked for my thoughtfulness.

Some cynic once said that "no good turn goes unpunished."

About a month later I received a $250 bill from the Energy company . I promptly called the Landlord and left a message that something was amiss. Later that night, after receiving no return call, I called again to discover that not only had my first message gone missing (dubious), but that there must also have been some mix up at the Energy company. I was advised that the Landlord had indeed attempted to tranfer the service out of my name... but that something must have been misunderstood. The conversation was closed with renewed assurances that the mix up would be amended and the bill paid.

See there Mr. Cynic... all taken care of. It was just a mix up and I was NOT being punished.

Yesterday I received a phone call from the Energy company.
The electronic voice in the message informed me that my service has been disconnected, and that for my convenience, there were a number of ways that I could pay my outstanding bill by phone.

Yes, yes, I suppose I was a bit hasty with my optimism...

Livid, but maintaining some self control, I called the Landlord's voicemail again. I ased if there was some reason that I was still being held responsible for a bill that I was assured would be paid. The voicemail didn't respond.

I left work, went home, collected family members for moral support in the decision to remove upwards of 8 inches of length from my hairs, and headed out.

On my return, I was advised that the Landlord had called and left a confirmation number for the bill in question and the message containing a lame excuse for not paying the bill. I am to rest assured, now, that the matter has been handled and my life can return to the normal worries of my own legitimate debts.

Later today I'm calling the Energy company.
I'm confirming the confirmation number.

I'm being responsible.

Love Plus One

ha ha ha - i amuse me

I had my hair cut yesterday... about 8 inches removed.

My family likes it. The only other person who has seen it didn't notice.

He's the security guard at my office building.


I like it too... I probably should have said that already.

It's funny... as my new hair was taking shape, I could feel the tension slipping out of my shoulders and neck. It was as if my stress, like Samson's strength, was housed in my hair.

The girl styled it wrong... I'm a no fuss kind of hair-wearer, and she spent about a half an hour using mousse and blow-drier to make my hair straight with a flip - ugh. But, it made her feel good (I could tell) and I didn't mind having someone play with my new stress-free head for a while.