Weekend Fizz

although i enjoy the idea of long languid summers, the heat and humidity does me in...

in my romantic mind, sultry summers are defined by Gatsby's daisy and the downy armed ladies of Prufrock - lounging on their setees amid the gently billowing ceiling to floor sheers against open windows enjoying the gentle breezes of high society and summering the hamptons

in reality, this kind of summer is a very alluring invitation to another bout of Epstein Barr / CFS. the languid i fantasize becomes the exhausted i experience, and sultry very quickly dissolves into sulky, as i realise that anything i think i want to do feels like it takes three or four times the effort than it normally would if i just didn't feel so ridiculously tired.

fortunately i can accept (because i am actively seeking the harmony life, and working to de-fuse the negative) that it doesn't take much energy to turn the pages of a book, laze in the porch swing, hug the baby, float around the pool, or even to attend the lovely wedding of a dear friend.

in spite of the fact that i let myself wallow - too much, i think - in the pleh of not having the energy / gumption to do anything that felt even remotely rewarding this weekend, it wasn't horrible - - in fact, there were moments of it that were downright GOOD.