Happy Halloween

The baby is learning how to trick or treat - graciously.

Yesterday, while out begging for candy from the neighbors on our street (who almost always have an early Hallowe'en so they can spend the real holiday on more populated streets), she learned some of the finer points of Trick or Treating.

item - when in polite society, one does not take something for nothing
Foo's take: when offered a bag of Hallowe'en candy, reciprocate with a rock from the driveway

item - never, ever, should one eat and run
Foo's take: not satisfied with merely trading rocks for Hallowe'en goodies, she felt compelled to cross thresholds and enter the kitchen with a "let's have some candy and a nice little chat" attitude

item - treat your neighbors as you would your family
Foo's take: she approached our house (i.e. returned home) with her goody bag extended and the cutest 18 month old rendition of "trick or treat" I think I have ever heard


The only downside to the whole weekend was the realization that we REALLY don't have enough space for a pony on our property.

Tonight we're off to Trick or Treat at Auntie S's house - and possibly Auntie C's as well! AH the joy of Hallowe'en!

Flagellant

Ok, so I don't use a cute little whip, and as far as I know I don't derive any sexual pleasure from it, but HOLY COW do I beat myself up for a good time.

Once a month my husband and I host our friends for the "EAU Night".
EAU stands for "Evil Around Us". It's a role-playing-game that we both play... and with a great deal of delight. It's one of my links if you're interested in reading more.

At any rate... the game is played on a Tuesday night. It means I have to forswear watching my (LOVINGLY nicknamed) Fat People Show, but that's no real sacrifice.
We take some time setting up and then cleaning up, but that's no real suffering.
From time to time I'm "nominated" to host the Evil Owl of Doom and even THAT isn't a struggle.

The real thing that beats me to pieces is that I'm used to going to bed at about 9 or 9:30 on most "school nights." My day usually starts sometime between 4:30 and 5:00 am and for some twisted reason, ever since having my daughter, I now require COPIOUS amounts of sleep. Once upon a time I could function perfectly well with no more than 4 or 5 hours per night - every night, and do well every day. Pregnancy and child-birth has broken me, which for the most part I don't mind, but it sure would be nice to not need sleep. Anywho...

Once a month, on Tuesday night, I go to bed between 12:30 and 1:00 am (gameplay usually runs until about midnight and then there's the saying good byes and the cleanup and almost ALWAYS the post-game discussion between my hubby and I... ) and wake up about four hours later SOOOO desperate for another hour or two... or three or even four. The next day (that would be today, btw) is always a rough one - far too many yawns, a general inability to actually focus, and generally a brainful of nightmarish scenarios too-well designed to be anything but intrusive and distracting - and I'm supposed to work.

If you haven't caught the gist of this by now, I'm totally not complaining about the game, the lack of sleep, or even the "thought provoking" quality of the game. I love it. It nourishes me. It is one of the few escapes I have allowed myself to keep.

If only the work day included a siesta...

The Village...

Oh And...

Friday night - oh my goodness, what a good time we had.

We went to Greenfield Village's Halloween Nights. It was SO cool.
The baby loved it.
My parents loved it.
I think even my husband enjoyed it.
As for me - I thought it was totally butt-kick good!

It is something that will more than likely become a family tradition... at least until the baby grows up too much to want to join us - then it might just be me and my parents, and possibly my husband - unless he was to be looking for a way to avoid it and uses the baby as an excuse.

I just had to share...

Bogged

Autumn in general, October specifically, is my favourite time of year. Totally...

I love the crisp in the air
I enjoy the fact that the "nights" are longer and that sometime around Hallowe'en we earn another hour in the day
I love hayrides (though I'm allergic), fallen leaves (though I am allergic), and the wafting aroma of wood burning in fireplaces.
I even enjoy cutting and splitting firewood (all done, mind you, with LOTS of mechanical assistance!).

I simply ADORE Hallowe'en (the ONLY holiday during which (witch?) NO ONE is obliged to cook, buy presents, or otherwise entertain anyone one might otherwise be obliged to... not to mention the wonderful prospect of dressing up, having fun, and getting the bejeebers (my mother's word) scared out of one.

Unfortunately, it is also THE time of year for me to overcommit myself. Between making costumes, decorating, baking (an absolute MUST at this time of year), hay rides, haunted housing, cutting and splitting wood, raking leaves, sitting in front of wonderfully toasty fires, attending parties, going for long winding drives to fill myself with awe at the beauty of the changing trees AND holding down a full time job, there just isn't enough time to do everything I REALLY REALLY want to do.

Already more than once I have actually found myself counting down the minutes until the end of the work day to get myself out of the office and into the crisp air, into the symphony of the wonderful tasks and events and occasions and doings that home holds.

My work isn't suffering - yet... but I can definitely feel the Autumn-Magnetism pulling at me, drawing more and more of my mental energies away from the dry business of numbers and analysis and deeper into the dark corners of Hallowe'en costumes, and the warm cozy aromas of autumn baking.

I don't want the European August... but I wouldn't mind commuting it to the USA October...

Return...

I've been gone for a while.

On Sunday last, while working diligently on the baby's Hallowe'en costume and some interior decor for the holiday, my husband got a call from Tennessee (his parents' homestead) with bad news - his mom was in hospital for an emergency surgery after a heart attack.

Within an hour we were all (meaning all of us - mom, dad, hubby, baby, cat, and self) packed and ready to head south. The original intent was for my husband to fly, the rest of us drive and meet up with him the next day... but the airlines aren't REALLY designed to be responsive to emergency situations, and all 5 (6 including the cat) were back in the car and on the road before 7:30.

12 hours later we arrived in TN, road weary and for the most part ready for bed.

Fortunately, during our drive we discovered that his mother had had the necessary surgery and that all things considered she was doing well.

There were some hiccups:
-- not enough of the cat's special food and syringes (he's diabetic and needs twice daily insulin shots) and none of his "anti-allergen" medicine
-- too much food purchased because we neglected to examine the fridge before we left for the store
-- phones (except mine) that refused to work once they got out into the wilds of Tennessee

There were some great moments too:
-- my daughter said something VERY close to "Grandmama" (her paternal grandmother's chosen moniker) for the very first time
-- Lemony Snicket's Series of Unfortunate Events
-- BEAUTIFUL scenery on the way back through many many mountains and lush hills filled with changing colors

All in all we made the trip there (and home) successfully... and I'm back in touch with the world.

all wonked up

My plan for this weekend was simple.

Friday night - prep all the stuff for the office
Saturday AM - make breakfast for family, eat breakfast with family, come to office and decorate the bejeezus out of it
Saturday PM - be home in time to watch some college football and make a nice dinner for the family, POSSIBILITY of grocery shopping
Sunday - pj day...

Friday night my daughter's godparents are coming over for dinner and a visit. This is NOT a bad thing... I'm actually very keen on seeing them. My husband is cooking dinner for us all. Heh heh heh. Besides, I can collect up the stuff I want to use in the office this evening, while my husband is gone doing his computer geek things.

Saturday I MAY be able to get him motivated enough to actually come with me to decorate, but last night I discovered that he has quite a bit of freelance work to do and since I'd like for him to be able to see his child one day this weekend, that makes Saturday the day for him to do it. There's still a shred of hope that he'll be able to do the freelance stuff in the afternoon/early evening (when I'd likely be grocery shopping and decorating the house for Halloween and working on my daughter's Halloween costume), and that he can come with me in the late morning and work on my office...

I like shreds of hope

I'm eternally optimistic

Sunday WILL be pajama day - unless it's nice enough to go outside and plant some bulbs... and a tree... and do some decorating for Halloween.

I just LOVE the autumn.

No Time Like the Present

I finally finished Lucy last night. It was good. There were actually points at which I cried.

I didn't do half the stuff I wanted to this weekend. Some of the important things that were missed:
- making the baby's halloween costume
- cutting wood
- cleaning my room

The only two important things that happened:
- mowing the lawn
- taking the baby for her first pony ride at the "pumpkin patch" that's literally right around the corner from our home. She LOVED it... I believe there were more than 2 shrieks of absolute delight. I couldn't have spent a better three dollars.

This means that I have a very busy week in front of me.
AFTER all of the stuff that I have to do at work (it's a financial reporting week, and I have an all day meeting on Thursday), and in addition to having company this Wednesday (I REALLY need to work out some communication issues with my husband... who naturally assumed I knew he meant having company when I naturally assumed he meant going for a visit...), I still have to work out cutting wood, at least STARTING on the costume, and DEFINITELY cleaning my room.

Yeah... and I was thinking about how nice it would be to have a mental health day sometime soon. Oh well.

1954

My morning commute really seems to be a source of inspiration for me. It's possible this is because I'm partly still asleep during, and much of what I see injects itself into my subconscious for further, later, consideration... or maybe it's just so dreadfully early in the morning that nothing else has really impacted my brain (life until work is - fortunately - fairly routine).

Anywho.

This morning, just as I was drawing the drive to a close, I noticed a sleek black Corvette with a license plate that read, simply, 1954. It most certainly was not the year in which the car was "born". Upon further (albeit hindered by dark morning sky coupled with tinted windows - ugh!) inspection, I concluded that it must be the birth year of the man driving the car.

It got me to wondering about my own midlife crisis, and how it will manifest.

I sometimes wonder if my decision for motherhood wasn't something of an early-stage indicator of oncoming crisis. But if I'm considering 50 midlife (optimistic aren't I?) then my early-stage hit about 17 years early... which is pretty serious pre-planning - even for me.

When I'm 50 my daughter will be 15.

Maybe her teen years will provide some insight into weathering the storm of uncertainty and self-actualization on the other end of the spectrum. Maybe I will be one of those beautifully gracious and graceful mom's who learns as much as I teach. Maybe I will have my moment of epiphany when she advises me that I need to "get over it, and come have some fun."

I'm not fussed... but it IS fun to think about.

Weekend...

It's quarter past seven on Friday morning and the sky is still black. The morning air is crisp with the onset of autumn, and I'm giddy for the weekend.

Tomorrow my friend Q and my daughter and I are embarking on our annual (though it seems to happen about every OTHER year these days) one-day (for the baby's sake) colour tour. For Q and I it's a return to our roots, as our destination is where we "landed" the first time we did this. It's called Uncle John's Cider Mill and I totally anticipate it being a LOT of fun.
My friend Q is a veritable font of everything good in a friend: she's funny, she's honest, she's profound, she's silly, and most and best of all, she makes me feel REALLY good about who I am.
My daughter absolutely LOVES the outdoors, and between the cider, donuts, train ride, wagon ride to the pick your own pumpkin patch, and corn maze, she will be in her glory tomorrow.

My only REAL concern right now is the traffic we'll likely face, as tomorrow is also the Great Michigan College Football Rivalry Game - where Q's alma mater (and my husband's) the University of Michigan will be battling it out against my old boss's and my friend Belle's alma mater Michigan State University. They're playing in East Lansing... which is due north of Uncle John's - on the same route as Uncle John's.

But what's a little traffic on a "don't have to rush to get there because we don't have a time line" kind of day?

Sunday is most likely going to be a day of lumber. We still have a significant number of trees that need to be cut into fireplace size so that they're ready for the log splitter... not to mention a significant number of trees that still need to be cut down and dragged to the wood pile... not to mention a wood "shed" that needs to be repaired, second and third and likely fourth and fifth storage areas that need to be "constructed", and all sorts of other winter preparations that need to be made before we're doing it in the snow.

I have a suspicion that we're going to be purchasing a high powered log splitter this year, instead of renting... but I could be wrong.

Ok - people are starting to arrive...

Have a great day - and a butt-kick weekend!

...a little like this

You're driving, successfully, down the road. You know where the brake AND accelerator pedals are. Both of your hands are on the steering wheel, and you have a pleasant-happy smile on your face.

Then all of a sudden a charcoal colored Vibe with spider decals in the windows and a slightly frustrated but optimistic looking red-head (with brown roots that are almost long enough to be dangerous) pulls into the lane behind you.

Suddenly your accelerator pedal disappears, your brake pedal becomes intermittent (available only seconds before you have to stomp on it to prevent being part of a multi-car pile-up), your cell phone rings, your other cell phone rings, a cigarette (you never smoked before!) is about to burn you, and there's a chocolate shake: all in your lap / all over the passenger seat / being used as a missile by your youngest child (you choose), and what's worse, your car has just developed a NASTY exhaust problem. You do NOT have a smile on your face, and all of your fingers (except your middle one) on your right hand fall off.

Sound ridiculous? Sound impossible?

I thought so too, but I have recently been paying a LOT of attention on my commute both to and from work, and invariably, the cars in front of me on the expressway are representative of the situation I just described above.

At least it's already Thursday.

Nickel and Dime

I am not an idiot. I just need to get that out there before I relate any of the following...

Ok - so now that you know I'm not an idiot, let me also remind you that occasionally I can be distracted from the finest of details by good news, interesting news, a fluff of dust-bunny drifting past the doorway...

I made a STUPID mistake on a report I just sent out.

I HATE making stupid mistakes. OK - I hate making mistakes in general... but ESPECIALLY stupid ones.

The good news is that I've booked our tickets for the Halloween at Greenfield Village event.
I have "ordered" the baby's flu shot (for her next visit at the end of October).
I have secured another case of Diabetic cat food for Ghengis.
And - despite the ridiculous error on the second report I sent out this morning - I've already sent out 3 reports this morning.

Not exactly a Rock Star Salamander morning, but not an entirely evil one either.

And then...

Maybe yesterday wasn't the best day to start my minimizing plan.

Not that I did poorly yesterday, I had salad for lunch and a pretty reasonable burrito for dinner.

But this morning - ugh - this morning was a pancake breakfast - for charity - at work. How can you pass up a pancake breakfast - for charity - on a Friday?

Even that would have been fine, I think, if the stress of the new job and my unfaltering inability to make a financial report work on the first try - EVER - pushed me over the stress-edge, and I wolfed down the 5 powdered sugar "donettes" that were so cruelly sitting in my snack bag.

If I didn't eat ANYTHING else for the rest of the day - or even if I just stuck to a harmless salad for dinner, I might be on the verge of ok for my diet plan. But alas...

It's Friday - which is my "Lunch with Q Day" (except when I'm not working or only working a half a day on Friday - then we push it back to earlier in the week) - and today lunch with Q is at Ogla's Kitchens - which is NOT a nice bland salad place for me to eat.

A possible solution - obviously - is for me to spend all of the time from when I get home to when I collapse in bed working out. But I somehow doubt that's likely to happen.

Most likely, I'll have my nice lunch with Q.
Come back to the office and have a meeting that will stress me into eating the pop-tart I didn't have yesterday, and then go home.
The stress of the commute will probably encourage me to make something comfort food-y for dinner (a nice juicy roast and some mashed potatoes and roasted carrots perhaps?) which after preparing I will devour, and then, in food coma, plant my ass in the comfy chair quietly playing with my daughter until one or both of us is too tired to be in decent company any more, then off to bed where all of the fat from all of my OH-SO-unhealthy eating for the day will immediately migrate to my previously planted ass, hips, thighs, and (new to the hit parade) stomach.

It might not be THAT bad. There is the possibility that I will take a postprandial walk with one or more of my family members down the tree-lined street on which we live... or perhaps, due to the cool weather it will be a bonfire-in-the-back-yard evening (no marshmallows - please!!!) which could possibly entail some heavy-ish lifting on my part.

OK my dear dear friends... thanks to your keen ears and attentive hearts, I have talked myself OUT of the comfy chair and into something a little like active after a good meal and before some good (and much needed) rest.

Thank you!

Poetry, Size, and Videotape

I heard once, I think it was in Abelard and Heloise, a lovely definition of Poetry...
Poetry is a mirror held to truth.
I've actually believe that to be true of all art... but that's beside the point.

Tuesday when I got home from work my family and I gathered 'round the television to watch videos of my daughter that they took that day at the grand opening of the Northville/Maybury State Park farm. My father has worked on this project almost exclusively since early this year. It's a great source of pride for him (I am proud of what he's done there as well) and it was a celebratory moment for he and his friends who put in many months of hard work.

By the way - my daughter had a rollicking good time - playing with horses, scaring turkeys, and dancing her little hiney off to the pounding groove of a dulcimer (and other instruments in a thrown together country band).

Anywho - while we were watching THOSE videos, we also took a quick break to look at some videos we'd take earlier in the year: one with her in bed with me, and a couple of us in the swimming pool. And - well - it was an awakening.

I had NO idea - not really - of how much weight I've gained... how gelatinous my stomach and thighs are... that I have fat rolls ON MY BACK. {shudder}

And if that wasn't incentive enough... yesterday mom came home with vacation photos. Vacation At The Beach photos, to be precise. I have two words:

NOT PRETTY

On the heels of these two words come a few, final, more.

I AM GOING ON A DIET AND EXERCISE PROGRAM.

I figure if I get you all involved in it with me, there's hope - a fleeting chance - that I will stick with it and actually do more than TALK about taking better care of myself. After all, Blogging it means I now have accoutablitiy for it.... right?

Moment of Weakness

Yesterday, as I was making my way through the too close for comfort but not quite bumper to bumper traffic of my hour long commute home, I looked up the road a bit at the window of a cranberry red mini-van in front of me.

There, hanging out the window, was a hand flicking a cigarette butt, attached to the arm of its owner by a wrist boldly bedecked in a bright yellow "live strong" bracelet.

My stomach turned with the power of self-righteous indignation.

Later when I told my husband this story, he reminded me that maybe that person was just having a moment of weakness.

My husband has a beautiful way of gently reminding me of my own moments of weakness.

Knee Deep

I'm finally deep enough into Lucy that I won't push her aside for something else... but only just barely.

I'm almost established in my new office (which is still slightly barren)... and working my way into being established in the job itself.

I've started taking vitamins again... we'll see how long I stick with it this time.

I think I'm going to take all of my CD's home again... I never listen to them here anymore.

I've decided on a Halloween costume for the baby - now I just have to get myself around making it.

I have my fingers crossed for my husband who is looking for the ever elusive brighter and better.

I am feeling the first twinges of a long off urge to have dinner plans with someone again.

Life is knee deep...

OH, And...

I finished Eldest - quite some time ago - last Friday.
I'm just as impressed as I ever was.

And now, painfully anxious for the next book.

Last Day

Whew.
It's been a long haul.

I have a few last items to tie up around here - some training, some sharing, a little lunch, a LOT of packing/moving.

My new team is anxiously awaiting my arrival - I got a really good taste of that yesterday.
My old team - at least some members of it - have made me aware that they're really sad to see me go.

I'm starting to feel the stress subside.

Eldest Update

In lieu of actually "living" I am still immersed in work, family life, and reading this exceptionally well-written but SERIOUSLY long book. It's over 600 pages. I have about 70 left. I am not bringing it to work because people invariably want to interrupt me during my lunch these days (with only 5 more working days before the big switch), and I'm fairly certain I'd be sorely tempted to bite someone if they dared to interrupt my reading.

It's a really good book.

Year Two

Today is mine and my husband's second wedding anniversary.

Tonight my husband and I will be having a nice dinner and possibly even watching a movie together.

There have been a lot of moments over the course of the past couple of years... life is moments.

I love him.
I love him more than I expected.

There are going to be a lot more moments over the arc of the future... life is moments.

And I love him...

... I can taste it...

9 days.

I'm doing a bunch of traning this week and next.

I'm very excited.